This article is co-written by Sarah Schewitz, PsyD. Sarah Shevitz, PsyD is a psychologist with over 10 years of experience helping couples and individual clients improve and change their behavior in love and relationships. He is the founder of Couples Learn, an online psychological counseling service.
The number of sources used in this article: 9. You will find a list of them at the bottom of the page.
It is not easy to love a girl whom you are not interested in, but this is not unusual. This scenario served as the impetus for the creation of most of the great works of art in the world. Unfortunately, if a person does not love you, you cannot make him change his mind. The only option is to come to terms with the truth, break ties with the girl (at least for a while) and focus on recovery.
If a woman does not like a man - 5 signs
In the last article, we talked about "how a woman loves." Today let's talk about the opposite: how to understand if a woman does not love a man? After all, it is important to understand all aspects of the relationship, and if it happens that a woman turns out to be cold to you, it is better to understand this as soon as possible. This will help either change the situation, or simply save your time spent on a woman who does not love you.
How to understand that a woman does not love you?
Women are different, and their love is also expressed in different ways. However, there are several points that nevertheless definitely help to clarify what is happening in the relationship. By the way, if the relationship lasts a long time - this makes it more difficult to determine the true state of things. Indeed, over time, feelings and emotions naturally decrease.
#1 A woman becomes closed. Communicates less with his man. It ceases to share some secrets, its problems. For its part, it ceases to be interested in what is happening in the life of her young man.
#2 Sex is rare or absent altogether. There is no craving for experimentation. A woman becomes less proactive.
#3 A woman spends more time without her partner. For example, you can go on vacation not with him, but with a girlfriend. Go for walks alone, etc.
#4 Changes in appearance for the worse. Ceases to follow itself. After all, she no longer wants to please her chosen one.
#5 There is no kinesthetics. That is, bodily touch. As a rule, at the beginning of a relationship there are quite a lot of her (gentle touches, stroking, kisses).
When a person ceases to love (whether it is a woman or a man), he ceases to give his energy in large quantities, becomes more emotionally closed. That is why the amount of sex is reduced and its quality is deteriorating, you want to touch the partner less and less. Consequently, there is less and less desire to spend time with him.
2. She no longer compliments you on your appearance
At the very beginning of your relationship, both of you had a physical attraction to each other and she often told you how attractive you are. Over time, you began to hear compliments from her less and less until the fact that she completely stopped making them to you. This may mean that you have lost your attractiveness for her in physical terms.
4. You rarely communicate
Communication is the cornerstone of any lasting relationship. The chance to maintain a relationship is much higher for those couples who can openly communicate with each other than those who prefer to close themselves from their partner. If deep conversations with meaning have disappeared from your relationship, your girlfriend has lost interest in you and the spark between you inexorably goes out.
7. You initiate all your conversations
If you have the feeling that lately you are the only one who is making some efforts to maintain your communication, you should start to worry. If she really loved you, she would always show a desire to communicate with you and share with you her feelings, thoughts and interests.
Why don't women like good men?
Often, if a woman fell out of love with a man, there are many objective reasons for this. For example, he began to drink, began to disrespect his partner, became tough. In a word, he made various mistakes in the relationship.
At first glance, paradoxical situations also happen: women do not like good men. However, if you look at this issue from the point of view of psychology, and there is a logical explanation:
- Good, intelligent men in Russia may look too weak for a woman and unsuitable for life in the harsh reality of this country.
- A woman lacks emotions, including negative ones. After all, a person without emotions lives bored. Moreover, each of us has a dark and bright side of the personality, requiring both positive emotions and not so much. It’s like a pendulum. A good man cannot give such emotions because of his upbringing, attitude, and possibly shyness.
- Sex with a good man is boring and “right.” A woman, on the contrary, wants a bad guy who “presses her against the wall” and makes her feel very excited. Also “bad” they are more prone to diversity and experimentation.
- The woman had a father who abused her in childhood. Scolded her, disrespectfully behaved in relation to her, perhaps beat. This model of man’s behavior is entrenched in her subconscious, and a good guy will never cause her feelings. The girl will look for a person similar in behavior to her father. Unknowingly, naturally.
What if a woman says she doesn’t like?
Pleasant in this situation is not enough. But you need to approach her with a sober head. Sometimes a woman can simply provoke a man with these words without saying them sincerely. It’s like a kind of “get me” game.
If it is clear that the woman speaks sincerely, then it is possible to take the following steps:
#1 Call her for a frank and honest conversation. Ask to describe her situation in more detail: what happened, because of which she lost feelings and when it happened. When you have complete information, it becomes more clear how to proceed.
#2 If you both come to the conclusion that you won’t be able to win back the situation, then accept this situation. If a woman stopped loving you, it makes no sense to spend your life on further disassembly. Find another love and try to forget the past.
#3 In any case, you can stay good friends. That would be the perfect option.
I wish sincere, pure and mutual love in your life!